Growing Out of Grief

 

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Everyone needs to grow something.  I have not blogged in a while, because I was growing.  I had to overcome the loss of a friend.  Actually, I did not overcome it, but took baby steps (I have even had to start over a few times) in learning how to miss her and not feel sadness–I plan to have to start over again probably after I write this.  Losing a lifelong friend has forced me to grow up faster than I knew I was capable of or ever even have to.  I’ve had to keep my ‘game face’ on for my kids when I did not think I was able to, and quietly sift through memories both good and bad of her time on earth with me.
Now for the ‘meat and potatoes’ of today’s blog.  My kids LOVE science experiments (in fact the little one just showed me one she has been working on today).  Today’s science feature is: How long does it take for 7 ice cubes to melt in a plastic container sitting on the kitchen counter–so far, they are half of the volume they were at about an hour ago.  We keep our house cold.
Weeks back–let’s say…..ooh, hmmmm, late June–we were given a gift from a dear neighbor of a little starter cell of basil.  I nursed it for about 2 weeks while it clung on for its life on the edge of my sink right next to the softsoap bottle.  Finally, the kids brought it to my attention that it was about to die and needed some emergency care.  We hopped in the car and picked up some new pots, soil, another basil plant and a young rosemary plant.  The kids planted them all on their own and have taken good care of them.  Except for when we left for vacation for 10 days.  I completely spaced on arranging for someone check on the plants while we were gone.  The 6 hour ride home from said vacation I prayed they did not dry up while we were gone.  They were a little dry–to say the least.   My older daughter gave them some ‘Plant CPR’, which consisted of rehydrating them and singing to them.  The next morning, they were perfect.   Had we been gone another night, there would have been no saving them.
So, it was at that moment that I realized that lives can be saved, but only when we can visually see that they are need of help.  It’s not science so much as it is common sense.
Older daughter, just came up to me and said that “each square of a quilt is like a different part of your life, and you sew them together and it never ends”.   Which ties in my fly by thoughts that quilts hold memories for future generations, and memories should never end, but be passed on to others.